It’s a very common occurrence to hear a single Christian girl say about her dream man – ‘He must fear God’.

I subscribed to that line of thought until a scripture I thought I understood struck me in a new light. Here it is: 16 We know how much God loves us, and we have put our trust in his love.

God is love, and all who live in love live in God, and God lives in them. 17 And as we live in God, our love grows more perfect. So we will not be afraid on the Day of Judgment, but we can face him with confidence because we live like Jesus here in this world.

18 Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love.[1]

I’ve found myself pondering this scripture and the more I ponder, the more amazed I get.

The one thing that God values above all things is Love because that’s who He is. Love is not what God does, It is who He is.

As a result, that’s how God wants us to live. He wants us to live in love, not in fear. Everything we do for God should be motivated out of our love for Him and not our fear of Him.

Fear and Love cannot co-exist. If you’re operating in fear, you cannot be operating in Love. If you’re truly operating in Love, fear should be out of the window.

Loving God is the access to heaven because it automatically means that we would have lived just like Jesus.

No wonder Jesus constantly admonished his disciples to love him.

Love will lead to wiling obedience while fear leads to compelled obedience.

Which one do you think God’s looking for?

Think about it, when you truly love someone, your sacrifices for them are joyful, spontaneous and you go out of your way to make them smile (to name a few of the things we do for love), Serving them is a joy not a duty. Doing anything out of fear has the exact opposite effect.

I know we’ve been thought that we need to fear God, but I’ve come to discover discover something different:

God wants your love and not your fear.

If you truly love God, you would not need to fear him.

My love for God needs to deepen!

Who’s with me!



[1] I John 4:16-18 (NLT)


6 Replies to “LOVE, NOT FEAR”

  1. The. Love and fear. Of God biblically stand for same tin.if u notice in d old testament fear was Used wen expressin peoples love for God.while in d new it was replaced wit Love.but I still think ur ryt in a way cos wen we say a man wit d fear of God,we. Don’t av Love close to our hearts

    1. Isabelle, Thanks for coming back! I like the fact that your reference to fear of God was in the Old Testament. You see, they did not have the kind of relationship Christ died for us to be able to have- a relationship of love and not of fear.
      You see, Christ makes all the difference!

  2. I am. This has always been my school of thought. I pray my man loves God. Even unbelievers can fear God. Nebuchadnezzar feared God at some point but it did not help him sustain a relationship with God.

    Loving God is everything we need cos we’d love to do His Word and be with Him and love to listen to Him.

    Think about it, would you rather your kids fear you or love you

  3. I THINK
    There’s a different in fear of punishment and in fear as a RESPECT.
    Proverbs 16:6 – By mercy and truth iniquity is purged: and by the fear of the LORD [men] depart from evil.
    Psalms 25:14 – The secret of the LORD [is] with them that fear him; and he will shew them his covenant.
    Proverbs 14:27 – The fear of the LORD [is] a fountain of life, to depart from the snares of death.
    Proverbs 3:7 – Be not wise in thine own eyes: fear the LORD, and depart from evil.
    Proverbs 14:16 – A wise [man] feareth, and departeth from evil: but the fool rageth, and is confident.
    AND when a girl say ,HER MAN TO BE MUST FEAR GOD …she meant that the man must respect God ,so he can respect her (not to be voilence on her) and the same with woman to man…there must be respect for a relationship to be strong & grow in happiness… WHEN YOU FEAR “RESPECT GOD” .. you do go committing adultery ;fornication & so ,that is what i understand. blessings

    1. Chyslove, Thanks so much for reading and for your detailed comment. If you would indulge me and read my response to Isabelle’s comment,I think you would understand me better and clear up any grey areas.
      Thanks again for reading and please do keep checking back for updates!

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